How To Have Confidence? I think Faith.
From my journalThis morning I had an insight about the issue of Confidence.
A friend told me that confidence comes from knowledge - The more you know, the more confidence you be. I don’t believe that Knowledge is the key to confidence. It does help… But, there are some people who doesn’t know much, but yet they are confident.
In fact, the lack of knowledge allows them to be confident. Knowing more stuff only makes you “feel” confident.. but is that really confidence?I think Faith is the key to having confidence. From what I learnt in church, Faith is the substance for things hope for, things yet unseen.. Faith is like raw energy..The more Faith you have, the more able you can GO to achieve stuff. Faith is the raw material to create results. Faith is always IN something. e.g Faith in Religion, in relationship, in yourself.. SO.. if you don’t have faith, then you have nothing in yourself, and without faith in yourself, you got no confidence that you can achieve…. So, question here is.. Do we have faith?
I’m not talking about religion.. in fact, to believe in an unseen God.. you need Faith.. so Faith is more elementary, basic.. fundamental.. PS: As I’m thinking, all the above can be a form of knowledge..But not academic, current affair knowledge… Yes, “Certain Kind of Knowledge” can gives knowledge. Just sharing.
I’m not talking about religion.. in fact, to believe in an unseen God.. you need Faith.. so Faith is more elementary, basic.. fundamental.. PS: As I’m thinking, all the above can be a form of knowledge..But not academic, current affair knowledge… Yes, “Certain Kind of Knowledge” can gives knowledge. Just sharing.
Moses Hng.
Refocus on: What I want in my life.
I want to be a psychologist, an expert in human behavior, a healer of hearts. To have my own private practice one day, to earn some money so I can start my own “Retreat Center”, a Bed & Breakfast in Thailand (or any beautiful island).
I will do Pro-Bono counseling work, Teaching Mindfulness, impacting communities, touching lives. My Bed & Breakfast, or Small Resort will be a place of healing, an Oasis, for the tired minds, heavy hearts.
I will teach, share my experiences with the young as I become a professor in a university, writing books. I will travel in Airstream Trailer, waking up in different beaches, landscapes as backdrop every morning.
As of 26 April 2012.
Moses Hng
那些年，我們一起追的女孩 : 柯震東
Zen: Different clouds formations, both in external and internal world.
There are different types of cloud formations ( http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_cloud_types).
In our internal world, there are different types of mental formations. It could be feelings, thoughts, habits, urges..
Most out the time, we are in the clouds… In the experience of those clouds, in the mist.. Unable to see the sky.
By being mindfully aware of the types of clouds in your mind, you rise above the clouds, and see the real picture..
Now you can identify the feeling clouds of sadness, joy, anxiety, fear, hopefullness, boredom, impatience, satisfaction… There are also thoughts and behavior clouds.. Understand how they are form, like the clouds in external world..
Clouds come and goes, they move, what remains is the sky, simply watch them pass by, change shapes into rabbits.. Haha.. Don’t hold on to them..
Let’s practise together,
Moses Hng
Don’t live on Auto-Pilot anymore. Go on Manual Control! Watch out for Red Flags!
Don’t live on Auto-Pilot anymore. Go on Manual Control! Watch out for Red Flags!
This entry was inspired by a friend, CGL
We were jogging at a stadium, and after a few rounds, I would say to him “Cannot! Cannot! Can’t run anymore...”.
As I was catching my breathe, he told me physically I could have continue running, but mentally, you gave up. (In a way, he was saying I am weak in my mind).
Instead of getting upset, I kind of got “enlighten”.
Remember what I’ve always wrote about Mindfulness, acknowledging your thoughts, be watchful of your thoughts and beliefs. This is happening to me, and I didn’t even realize it.
I wanna share with you the insights I got.
Self-Preservation Auto-Pilot
In our mind, there is this Self-Preservation Auto-Pilot, it’s programme since young, from past learning experiences to keep us from dangers. It works by sending “Red Flags” to us like, “Better don’t do it”, “It will not work”, “You are tired, take a rest”, “It’s too difficult for you”, “Let someone else do it”, “Your stamina is not as good”, “It will just be like the last time”..
First of all, it’s a flawed system.
Second, we are unaware of it! It just run in the background, it’s automatic.
Third, We automatically believe our thoughts as if it’s true!
This is a pervasive auto-pilot system that is in all aspect of our life! Fitness, Work, Love life.. etc.
Keeping Us Prisoners
With that “Auto-pilot” in place, we are constantly shepherd by our mind through the “Red Flags” to keep to our boundaries. It limits our abilities, and possibilities. We are kept within our “comfort (or really, discomfort) zone” We are fenced in!
Recognized It! Take on Manual control
From now on, be aware of those “Red flags” your Auto-pilot is sending you. Recognised that all of those red flags are historical, based on PAST learning and experiences… It is often flawed! There’s a bigger pasture outside of the fence..
Take on Manual control.
Acknowledge those Red Flags.
Thank your mind for doing that to keep you safe (but it’s not working).
Create new Green Flags to overwrite the system.
Instead of “I’m tired, can’t run anymore”, say “I am tired, but I can still go on, even though I may run slower, I will not stop!”.
What do you THINK?
Moses Hng
I’m Proud To Serve As A National Servicemen. (NSmen)
I’m Proud To Serve As A National Servicemen (NSmen)
養兵千日，用在一朝
I have just finished my In-Camp Training. Guess I am still feeling high from the camaraderie flowing inside me now. I am inspired!
I believe in National Service.
I believe that it is the duty of every Sons of Singapore to safeguard the motherland, to ensure her sovereignty.
To protect her from bad people. We are the force that get things done, decisively and awesomely!
Perhaps, it’s evolutionary, that we search for self-transcendence, (TED TALK by Jonathan Haidt), that we are drawn to circle around something that is bigger then ourselves.
When I serve, I am able to appreciate the bigger picture. No matter what the politicians are saying about National Service, the question is “If we are not willing to protect our home, who will?!”. If you have the intention to “abandon ship” when trouble comes, you are already not part of us in the first place, just saying.
养兵千日用在一朝 ( lit. Train an army for a thousand days to use it for one morning. (idiom); fig. extensive preparation eventually pays off).
I believe to be a Singaporean, it means to be part of something bigger.
Proud to be serving,
I’m a second generation PR turned Citizen, Moses Hng
I’m a second generation PR turned Citizen, Moses Hng
I finally said “I Love You” to my parents.
I finally said “I Love You” to my parents.
Tonight, I finally have the courage to told my parents that I love them.I was nervous and anxious, because we never did such things before, it’s just not in our culture.
This has been bothering me for so long, because I know, I should express my love .. say it out, not just buy gifts or buy meals..
So I just follow my gut feelings.
I sat them down at the living room sofa.. Mum thought it was something bad.
I said “Mum and Dad, I have been thinking about this for a long time. And, you know what I do in my job, I deal with people’s relationships, and this is something i wanted to say to their for a long time. That is, I love you.
Mum, I know there are times I didn’t show my appreciation for what you have done. Cooking for me, taking care of me since young.
Dad, you have worked hard, saving money to take care of the family.
I just want to say I love your.
(Mum said, I understand, it’s just weird for us… we are Chinese.. very weird if we never do it since young.. i understand. Dad said, you have the intention is good enough).
I said, but if i don’t say now, then when?
I gave mum a hug, and she teared a bit with joy.
Dad sat there laughing, not used to it.
We talked a bit, and i told dad to take care of his health. So when i got the money, he is healthy enough to travel :)
* * * * * * *
Ladies and Gentlemen, Please just do it too :)
Don’t wait till it’s too late.
When they are not around anymore, you will have no more chance!
I think our family relationships will even be better now :)
Phew….. :)
I am glad I did it :)
Bless you!
Moses Hng
Pain in life are natural, sufferings are optional.
Last week, I attended a Introductory workshop on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, ACT (Pronounce as act). Trainer was Mark Webster from the UK and James Luoma from the States. Both are very experienced psychologist, and I’ve learnt lot of insights from the 3 day course.
Here I would just like to share on some of the insights I have received. It may sound more philosophical then science.. But i think it will bless you.
Assumptions
There is an “assumption” in our society that says “PEOPLE SHOULD BE HAPPY”; “If you are not happy then something must be wrong”, and we try to remove that “problem”, thinking that if we remove the “problem” then people will be naturally happy. However, if we look at the percentage of people in the world who are suffering from war, disasters, medical or psychiatric illness, suicidal, the crimes and stresses of life, it should be “abnormal” to be happy. It may be a false belief we have.
Pain in life are Natural
Emotions such as fear, worries, sadness, anxiety, are actually quite normal. We experience them due to their own reasons. We are worried for those we loves, upset when we are hurt etc.
Emotions such as fear, worries, sadness, anxiety, are actually quite normal. We experience them due to their own reasons. We are worried for those we loves, upset when we are hurt etc.
Just as normal as emotions like happiness, joy, excitement, gladness etc. These experiences are part of life! It’s Pain that we can’t avoid as long as we are alive.
But often, we try to avoid those feelings.. Our mind tells us to NOT have them because its “bad” or “unnatural”, or “socially unacceptable.”
Think of the times when you try to tell yourself Stop thinking or feel certain way? That’s a thought.
Sufferings are Optional
Usually our way of avoiding those feelings/situations does give us some immediate relief… for example, instead of feeling sad, they feel drunk! (Delay accepting pain).
Instead of feeling anxious, they feel they are in control by doing other things (procrastination, Delay accepting pain), Getting ANGRY when you are hurt (Feeling anger is more acceptable then feeling hurt (Delay accepting the pain).
However, we must think of the consequences in the long run, most of the time, it will lead to MORE of those negative feelings we try to avoid. By delaying, we often have more losses (of opportunity, time, and abilities). That’s additional pain, and then people try to avoid that. It becomes a loop! it’s Suffering!
Wouldn’t it be better if we can reduce the pain?
The simple idea is, if we can be more aware and mindful of our thoughts, and to be willing to accept the pain in life as being normal, then we don’t have to use various methods to resist them, because in resisting the pain, it generates sufferings which are optional.
When the tidal waves (PAIN) comes, be aware of them (Mindful Awareness), learn to stay afloat (accepting) instead of trying to fight (Actions to avoid) and be drowned (Suffering).
Please, questions and comments are welcome. Thank you
Moses Hng
Recommend: Watch “The Iron Lady”
“Watch your thoughts for they become words. Watch your words for they become actions. Watch your actions for they become… habits. Watch your habits, for they become your character. And watch your character, for it becomes your destiny! What we think we become.” Margaret Thatcher
Review by Telegraph
Moses Hng
Eat Mindfully, can also loose weight.
Dear friends,Would like share with you something I’ve learnt, and is practising. Mindful Eating.Most of the time, when we eat, we don’t pay attention to what we are eating. We think of work, plan for activities, chit chat.. you are chewing and swallowing automatically, but your mind is somewhere else.Slow down.1. Sit down, practise slow and mindful breathing, half smile.. you feel sense of calm and appreciate rise.2. When food arrive. Look at it. Continue to slowly breathe in, enjoy the wonderful aroma.3. Then, mindfully, bring a bite to your mouth.. take in a breathe. Enjoy. Slowly chew, stay with it, enjoy the texture.. spend some time! You worked hard, for what?? To enjoy this moment.. the fruit of your labour4. Smile. Reflect upon the many hands that has plant, harvest, transport, clean, wash, serve your plate of rice.. the whole world is in it! 5. You will soon get into the habit of slowing down, you begin to realise you don’t need that much of food.. your digestive system thank you, because you chew enough, it doesn’t have to work so hard.. your body takes in nutrients easier.Try it my friends.
I feel that food taste so much more delicious, everything taste good.Have a mindful day!Moses Hng
Sent from my HTC
I feel that food taste so much more delicious, everything taste good.Have a mindful day!Moses Hng
Sent from my HTC
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